http://openjokes.com Jokes for all ages with pictures videos text and more Thu 11 Mar 2010 18:10:02 MST http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.2 en 2010-03-11 http://www.openjokes.com/719-life-cycle-of-an-it-employee.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-21 13:09:59 guest http://www.openjokes.com/719-life-cycle-of-an-it-employee.htm Life Cycle of an IT Employee
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/718-perfect-son.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-17 14:54:12 guest http://www.openjokes.com/718-perfect-son.htm A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday. ;)]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/717-how-to-encourage-a-man-to-wash-his-hands.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-17 14:44:49 guest http://www.openjokes.com/717-how-to-encourage-a-man-to-wash-his-hands.htm How to encourage a man to wash his hands
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/716-chair-pants.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-16 14:46:37 guest http://www.openjokes.com/716-chair-pants.htm Chair Pants
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/715-awesome-find-the-truth-if-you-can-just-laugh.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-04 15:10:48 guest http://www.openjokes.com/715-awesome-find-the-truth-if-you-can-just-laugh.htm VVVVVVVV

VVVVVVVV



]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/714-how-to-make-wife-fool.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-01 12:18:02 guest http://www.openjokes.com/714-how-to-make-wife-fool.htm Youtube Videos]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/713-world-from-a-baby.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-01 12:05:46 guest http://www.openjokes.com/713-world-from-a-baby.htm Youtube Videos]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/712-weirdest-wedding-invitations-2.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-01 11:42:38 guest http://www.openjokes.com/712-weirdest-wedding-invitations-2.htm Weirdest Wedding Invitations 2
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/711-weirdest-wedding-invitations-1.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-01 11:31:38 guest http://www.openjokes.com/711-weirdest-wedding-invitations-1.htm Weirdest Wedding Invitations 1
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/710-how-it-feels.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-02-01 11:26:42 guest http://www.openjokes.com/710-how-it-feels.htm A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!
Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.
TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD!
WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL!
I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?
Have you LOST your mind?
Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving." ;)]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/709-how-to-get-a-boyfriend.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-01-15 11:04:52 guest http://www.openjokes.com/709-how-to-get-a-boyfriend.htm How to get a Boyfriend
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/707-rush-hour.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-01-15 10:58:39 guest http://www.openjokes.com/707-rush-hour.htm Rush Hour
]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/# http://www.openjokes.com/706-how-to-wash-the-cat-funny-way.htm http://www.openjokes.com/# 2010-01-15 10:56:01 guest http://www.openjokes.com/706-how-to-wash-the-cat-funny-way.htm 1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water.

3. Obtain the cat and carry him to the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for anything he can find.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I have
found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.]]> daily 1.0 http://www.openjokes.com/#